Dec 23
by Chris Christensen
news
Bigger Cruise Ships - In a surprise move by cruise companies competing to make the largest cruise ship, Royal Caribbean will buy the U.S.S. Hornet from the U.S. Navy and refit it as a cruise vessel. The flight deck will be converted into a 9 hole golf course and the catapult will be used to launch parasailers.
Flight Delays - An increase in the number of flights stranded on the tarmac of major U.S. airports will give rise to tarmac based hotel chains so that the airline will not have to return the aircraft to the gate and lose credit for an “on-time” departure.
Passenger’s Bill of Rights - Public outcry will once again peak calling for a passenger’s bill of rights after the discovery of Flight 304 which had somehow gotten lost in the outdated air traffic control system and had been sitting on the runway in Cleveland for 6 years. There were some reports of cannibalism when the peanuts finally gave out, but what finally gave a face to this tragedy was young Robbie Barnsworth who was born and raised on the airplane. His mother was only 7 months pregnant when she boarded the flight. The testimony of young Barnsworth who learned to read from safety brochures and outdated magazines finally galvanizes congress to take an immediate action. They call for an immediate recess. Ironically 3 of the congressmen will board a flight to Bermuda and will be similarly lost on the Dulles tarmac. No public out cry will ensue.
Airport Security - Increasing stringent searches from the TSA will lead to the creation of the first all nudist airline whose passengers will spend much less time in airport security. Surprisingly the airline will be based in Wisconsin and will be called Dairy Air.
Adventure Travel - The opening of the Club Med in Kandahar, Iraq gets off to a very rocky start with a series of SNAFUs because of some miscommunication involving red tape. While the resort will prove to be all inclusive, the guests will accidently be issued combat fatigues and weapons. Despite this unexpected direction the resort will prove to be a surprising commercial success with the adventure travel crowd.
Gas Prices - The rising price of gasoline will have a dampening effect on domestic travel. Several states will switch their state lottery from offering cash to a tank of gas with great success. Home exchange websites will emerge where instead of swapping homes with a complete stranger you will just exchange pictures of your house for theirs and imagine what it would be like to have enough gas to leave your home town.
Global Warming - A new study will reveal surprisingly good news about the cause of global warming. Despite the expectation of many that the U.S. congress was causing global warming with its lack of action it is determined that it is the actual heated debate in congress that is the primary cause of global warming. When congress is hermetically sealed the worldwide trend is nearly completely halted except for an unexplained hot spot located near the Dulles airport.
Leave a Reply
Tags: travel predictions
Copyright 2009 by Chris Christensen
January 18th, 2008 at 6:49 pm
8. The 2008 Summer Olympics in China will instigate another 1,000 investigative reports in various newspapers about the rising asian super-power in order to play on people’s curiosity and/or xenophobia.
January 19th, 2008 at 9:20 am
LOL, I wish I had thought of that.
January 19th, 2008 at 4:00 pm
I love # 4 - beautiful!